I was afraid to let go and allow myself to fully feel the emotions I thought would drown me. I didn’t trust me to honor my emotions without losing myself in them, held captive and depraved.
I tried to control the ride and the outcome by suppressing my soul only to create a mechanical projection of the expectations I absorbed.
I have walked through life allowing others to pick the rides we took. Somehow most of my time was spent going against myself.
This past year I have learned that letting go doesn’t mean approaching life without intention. I have seen the power of speaking your intention into the universe and trying doors to find the ones that align with my intention.
I recently had an incredibly productive day and was starting to reap the rewards of previous efforts. When I shared my joy with my soul companion, he called it a “Hell yes!” day. It’s true it had been an amazing day and I was on cloud nine. I realized he was right that is what I was feeling.
I’ve started asking myself each day what would it take for this to be a “Hell yes!” day. I make a list of tasks that will further my journey to my intention. As I complete items I add them to my completed list. Sometimes it isn’t feasible to complete everything, something comes up unexpectedly, I add it to my list for the future. I also add new tasks that I find I need to take in the future to keep moving forward.
My new favorite thing to do is to add an all day event called “Hell yes!” to my calendar. Speaking of which. I have a few more stacks of laundry to put away before I can put “Hell yes!” on New Years Eve 2022.
May 2023 be filled with “Hell yes!” days!